Have you noticed that football commentators are able to turn any once inconsequential achievement into a bona fide record using only their mouths, a misplaced sense of achievement, and that bastion of and deceit and misdirection - statistics?
Once upon a time, when the world was far simpler and our goal umpires wore boaters and lab coats, we heard of records for the most goals in a season, the most consecutive wins and the largest winning margin.
Today we hear of the most goals kicked ... against an interstate team ... at the MCG ... in the third quarter ... by a number 5 draft pick ... in his 4th AFL game ... wearing yellow boots ... with a heavily strapped scrotum ... and an aunt name Vera.
I'm sorry Messrs Cometti, Hutchison, Lane, McAvany, Brayshaw and co - these are no longer notable achievements, and whilst I commend what is undoubtedly a stirling level of dedication and committment from your statisticians and researchers, perhaps it's all gone just a little too far.
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